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Sunday 22 May 2011

Toilet theme...

We were in bed and we heard gunshots, so we looked outside to see a man running away from the rabbit shed carrying half a cow. 

We went to check the rabbits and luckily despite the fact someone had stolen their nest, they were fine, although one of them had turned orange. 

A man who turned out to be an investigator suddenly appeared. He asked who the cow belonged to and we said our neighbour. We tried to ring them but my phone set me puzzles and riddles to find the number, then the number kept moving when I tried to touch it on the screen. 

When I eventually got to ring no one answered.  It was very frustrating.

I spotted a Tesco bag with receipts and a framed photo in it, which turned out to be evidence but I ruined it by putting my fingerprints on it. 

I went off to find some toilets and there were 6 doors all in a row...3 marked ladies and 3 marked gents...but inside, all 6 doors led to just one room with two toilets (no cubicles). 

I went to sit on one, but I realised a woman in a wheelchair was reversing into me and pushed me off the toilet and trapped me in a corner while she used the loo. 

She wouldn't let me use the second (male) toilet because she said it was for disabled people and I shouldn't be there. 

I left the room and found myself in a dentist surgery where a person that kept changing from a woman to a man was strapped down in the dentist chair being threatened with sexual assault (but didn't seem to mind). 

There was quite an audience standing watching and they were all very matter of fact and just said Hi as I walked through. 

I came out into what looked like a huge makeshift car park (surface was gravel and pink dust), with lots of portakabins everywhere. There was a woman who said she was a 'gypsy culture princess' and she said we weren't allowed behind any of the portakabins due to cultural differences.   She went behind one, and another blonde woman stood in our way to stop us following.  

We managed to get past only to find the woman crouching down over hay......defecating. 

We looked a bit horrified, but our visible reaction really offended them and loads of people suddenly appeared, turned against us as being ignorant of their culture and chased us off shouting 'texi texi texi'. 

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